Bài đăng trên Tuổi Trẻ, chủ nhật 24/10/2010, click view original post
TT – Nhiều chàng trai nước ngoài đã có những cuộc chinh phục thú vị với các cô gái Việt Nam. Sự khác biệt văn hóa càng đem đến cho họ cảm hứng và nhiều cuộc chinh phục đã nên duyên vợ chồng.
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Tình yêu khác quốc tịch cũng nặng tính duyên phận để có thể thành đôi (ảnh minh họa) – Ảnh: T.T.D. |
Cự ly gần
Không tham vọng lấy chồng Tây vì so với tiêu chuẩn vẻ đẹp Việt Nam, nhan sắc của Hồng (28 tuổi, đang sống tại TP.HCM) chỉ ở mức trung bình. Nhưng anh kỹ sư người Đức qua Việt Nam làm việc chung công ty với Hồng say cô như điếu đổ. Còn Hồng lại nghĩ đàn ông Tây sống thoáng, thuyên chuyển công tác liên tục, chuyện yêu đương với phụ nữ bản xứ có khi chỉ là những cuộc vui thời vụ nên luôn giữ khoảng cách. Có lẽ vì sự né tránh của Hồng mà chàng Tây càng dành thời gian tạo dựng niềm tin đối với Hồng.
Dù từng thành kiến rất lớn, song trước những điều nghiêm túc chàng trai tóc nâu này chứng tỏ, cộng gần một năm tiếp xúc với mật độ “hằng ngày”, Hồng đã bẽn lẽn gật đầu chấp nhận lời cầu hôn. Nói chuyện qua mạng Internet từ Malaysia (đất nước vợ chồng Hồng đang làm việc), cô khoe: “Cưới nhau được nửa năm và khá bận rộn công việc, nhưng những lúc bên nhau anh ấy vẫn ngọt ngào như thuở trăng mật”.
Mai Thu (29 tuổi, cũng ngụ tại TP.HCM) hoàn toàn khác với Hồng, cao ráo, đẹp mặn mà, nhưng phớt lờ mọi tình yêu. Thu nói cô không có lòng tin ở đàn ông sau khi bước ra khỏi nhiều cuộc tình đổ vỡ. Đến giờ gần 30 mà chỉ muốn sống độc thân. Một “ông Tây” Hà Lan (gần 50 tuổi), sinh sống tại Việt Nam bốn năm, “chết đứ đừ” trước vẻ bất cần của Thu. Ngày nào cũng nhắn tin gọi điện hỏi chuyện, Thu cáo bận thì ông ta viết email, lâu lâu lại gửi hoa đến văn phòng. Trong suy nghĩ của Thu, đàn ông chỉ thích nhan sắc của cô, khi có được rồi sẽ bỏ!
Dĩ nhiên cô nói thẳng với ông Tây nọ suy nghĩ này khiến ông ta cuống quýt hứa hẹn: sẽ làm bạn với cô trước, sẽ đem lại niềm tin cho cô, sẽ không bao giờ nói gì hoặc làm gì khiếm nhã cho đến khi họ là vợ chồng. Dù vậy, Thu cũng không chú tâm lắm đến những hẹn thề đó, cô cứ hờ hững trước sự si tình của ông Tây ở cách mình chỉ vài cây số.
Cho đến những cuộc tán tỉnh xuyên lục địa
Hai năm trước Yên Thảo (26 tuổi, sống tại TP.HCM) vào các phòng chat nước ngoài để luyện khả năng ngoại ngữ. Yên Thảo đã nói chuyện cùng một người Mỹ gốc Trung Đông tên Rasoul hơn cô 10 tuổi. Sau hơn một tháng trò chuyện trên mạng, email và gửi hình cho nhau, Rasoul bay qua Việt Nam thăm Thảo. Do kém phản xạ khi trò chuyện nên ngày đầu tiên Rasoul thuê phiên dịch để nói về mong muốn của mình. Rasoul muốn kết hôn rồi đưa Yên Thảo qua Mỹ.
Ngày thứ hai, họ giao tiếp bằng cách viết ra giấy những gì muốn nói. Gia đình Thảo khuyên cô nên nắm bắt cơ hội. Ngày thứ ba họ đi dạo ở công viên, bỗng nhiên Rasoul quay qua hỏi: “Can I hold you?” (tạm dịch: “Tôi có thể ôm em không?”) rồi bất ngờ ôm Thảo kiến cô hoảng hốt bỏ về.
Rasoul nhắn tin hỏi cô không muốn kết hôn nữa sao, Thảo trả lời lại: nên làm bạn trước đã! Cô gái trẻ này tâm sự: “Khi chưa gặp, lần nào nói chuyện qua mạng Rasoul cũng nói những lời ngt nọgào khiến tôi lâng lâng và nuôi hi vọng lấy chồng nước ngoài. Nhưng gặp mặt mới biết mình với người ta rất xa lạ, rào cản ngôn ngữ, khác biệt văn hóa và lòng tự tôn dân tộc khiến tôi không thể nào bất chấp tất cả để xuất ngoại”.
Thảo còn kể thêm năm ngoái Rasoul gửi email cho cô, nói rằng anh ta đã thử tìm vợ ở Trung Quốc, Thái Lan… nhưng không gặp ai đẹp như Thảo, nếu cô đồng ý kết hôn, anh ta sẽ bay sang Việt Nam lần nữa.
Song có những chân tình đã tìm được bến đậu. Ngọc Diễm (25 tuổi, Vũng Tàu) được người bà con ở Ohio (Mỹ) giới thiệu cho một anh chàng người Mỹ vì anh ta thích tìm hiểu văn hóa Việt Nam. Đầu tiên chỉ là trò chuyện qua Skype để cô nâng cao vốn ngoại ngữ. Sau đó, những lời tỏ tình ngọt lịm của anh chàng Jim kia khiến tim Diễm xao động.
Hai người yêu nhau “online” nửa năm, chia sẻ mọi câu chuyện buồn vui, nhưng gia đình Diễm đều nghĩ cô ảo tưởng mới yêu đương một chàng trai cách nửa vòng trái đất và chưa hề gặp mặt. Cho đến khi Jim xuất hiện bằng xương bằng thịt tại nhà Diễm, cả gia đình cô đều gật đầu ủng hộ chuyện tình của đôi trẻ. Đám cưới của Diễm diễn ra và giờ cô đang lo thủ tục để theo chồng về Mỹ.
Thực tế nhiều cô gái Việt lấy chồng Tây được hạnh phúc, nhưng không phải tất cả các cô gái Việt đều sẵn sàng đổ rạp xuống trước sự chinh phục của những người đàn ông tóc vàng mắt xanh. Tình yêu khác quốc tịch vẫn muôn hình vạn trạng và nặng tính “duyên phận”.
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