Bài đăng trên Tuổi Trẻ thứ bảy, 23/10/2010. Click view original post
TT – “Đàn ông xây nhà, đàn bà xây tổ ấm” là chuyện lâu nay. Song không hiếm những người đàn ông mải mê kiếm tiền để mong xây một cái nhà thật to mà lơ là bạn đời của mình, cho đến lúc bàng hoàng nhận ra: vợ không muốn xây tổ ấm nữa, vợ muốn thoát khỏi cuộc đời ta…
Anh Q.A. (30 tuổi, ngụ tại TP.HCM) sau khi đặt bút ký đơn yêu cầu ly hôn của vợ được một tháng vẫn chìm đắm vào cảm giác tiếc nuối, xót xa. Trong tâm thức còn lộn xộn những kỷ niệm cũ và hiện tại đầy ân hận, anh Q.A. chia sẻ: “Khi yêu thì luôn nghĩ về nhau, tới lúc kết hôn cùng chăn gối thì lơ là, nghĩ tình yêu vẫn còn đó, không nuôi dưỡng khiến nó chết từ từ. Lúc vợ tôi nói đã có người khác, quyết định ra đi, tôi mới biết trái tim mình tan nát. Dù tôi cố mọi cách níu kéo cô ấy ở lại nhưng đã trễ, bởi phụ nữ rất sợ tổn thương lần nữa…
Tôi đang thay đổi bản thân, không phải theo ý muốn của cô ấy mà bởi tôi nhận ra mình đã sai. Và tôi vẫn chờ cô ấy hồi tâm”. Còn anh Tuấn Ngọc (33 tuổi, ngụ tại Hà Nội) phải đối diện với căn nhà trống hơn một năm trời. Ban ngày công việc giúp anh quên đi tình cảnh của mình, nhưng hằng đêm vẫn chưa thoát khỏi sự chống chếnh và hụt hẫng về cuộc hôn nhân tan vỡ. Suốt thời gian qua anh vẫn mong chờ vợ tha thứ cho sự vô tâm và những lỗi lầm của mình.
Khi biết vợ mang trong trái tim hình bóng một người đàn ông khác, anh Giang (36 tuổi, ngụ tại Đà Nẵng) đã chọn giải pháp chia tay nhưng theo kiểu những người bạn với nhau. Ngày chia tay anh vẫn chở vợ đến tòa, hết phiên xử lại chở về. Anh chuyển đến một thành phố khác, để lại tất cả nhà cửa và tài sản chung của hai vợ chồng. Vẫn là bạn tốt của vợ cũ, vẫn chia sẻ mọi chuyện với nhau, vẫn dạy con phải thương mẹ và hiểu cho mẹ. Và vẫn yêu nhưng biết rằng sẽ không bao giờ quay lại.
Dường như phụ nữ có thể chấp nhận và bỏ qua – dù không dễ dàng – khi chồng mình xảy ra chuyện ngoài chồng ngoài vợ, nhưng đàn ông rất khó đối diện với sự thật vợ mình có tình cảm với một ai khác.
Có người lập tức chia tay “cô đường cô, tôi đường tôi”, mỗi khi nói về người cũ chỉ toàn là những dằn vặt đay nghiến. Họ cho rằng cái gì đã vỡ là vỡ, thà nhớ lại khi nó tốt đẹp nhất còn hơn là chắp vá lấy được để rồi suốt đời cứ phải thấy những chỗ vỡ… Có người im lặng, vẫn duy trì hình ảnh một gia đình nhưng trong lòng không thật sự quên vết hằn về nỗi đau đó, một rào chắn bằng dây gai xuất hiện giữa hai người mãi mãi. Cho đến lúc mọi thứ vỡ tan, những yêu thương trước kia cũng không cách gì hàn gắn nổi…
Chia tay một tình yêu, rời bỏ một cuộc hôn nhân, dù bằng cách này hay cách khác, dù vô tình hay cố ý, dù muốn hay không cũng chẳng dễ chịu chút nào, nhất là khi tình cờ gặp lại…
HỒNG ÂN – LINH ĐỖ
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